Bella's Choice
by vampiregirl1995
Summary: what if Bella chose jacob? could edward really just let her go? would it work out between Bella and Jacob? would Bella and edward still be friends? takes place during eclips after the fight. see story for full summary.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter one- decision**

**Summary-** (I know, not a creative title, please reads anyway, it might be good, I wouldn't know because I wrote it) what if Bella chose Jacob? Could Edward really just let her go? Would he even need to fight for her back? Would it work out between Bella and Jacob? Would Bella and Edward still be friends? Takes place during Eclipse after the fight. Bella doesn't tell Jacob good by when she went to see him. She made her decision after she got home, when she was in bed. Starts with Bella in her bed trying to sleep. (Sorry I'm really bad at summaries.)

**disclamer**- stephanie myer owns it all, i'm not that amazing.

Bella's pov

I had made the most painful decision of my life. I loved them both with every fiber of my being but I knew that Jacob was slightly better for me. If only I didn't have to decide just yet, if only I never had to choose. But that would be selfish and I couldn't hurt ether of them any more. They both deserve better than me.

I had fought with myself for hours, listed all the pros and cons.

I knew that living without Edward would be hard, painful, at first, but I had done it once before and Jacob overshadowed that pain. Jacob, it was hard to admit, could give ma a little bit more than Edward.

All night I cried, how would I tell Edward, how bad will it be? How hard would it be to tell him I loved Jacob more? What would he do?

I didn't sleep at all that night and in the morning I got up and decided to tell Edward first, he deserves to be the first to know.

As I walked down the stairs the phone rang. Slowly, I walked over and picked it up.

"Hi, Bella? It's me Alice." Her voice sounded concerned as she continued. " I had a vision of you telling Edward. If it makes it any easier do you want me to tell him for you?" it was tempting to say yes but that wouldn't be right for Edward, I would have to be the one to tell him myself. "No, Alice, thank you though." I replied in a dull voice.

Hanging up the phone I opened the fridge and grabbed a water bottle, seeing as I was too upset to eat, and then went to gab my jacket. I could feel the numbness take over my body and I let it, actually I was thankful for it.

I could feel the return of the zombie days and that brought on a wave of pain the numbness couldn't deflect. The whole way toward Edward's house I fought with the tears that threatened to overcome me.

I knew I was going to break Edward's heart and that was the worst part. I knew I would have to see the pain in his eyes that he wouldn't be able to conceal with the blank, masked expression that he had when he was trying to hide painful emotions from me.

As I approached the break in the trees I slowed, almost to a stop. I didn't want to do this. I didn't want to break Edward's heart. But I had to tell him I couldn't be with him. I crept down the long driveway to his house.

Every second seemed to go by in exaggerated slow motion. Like I was stuck in this painful point in time, doomed forever to live in the painful truth of what I was about to do. It was so hard to do this to Edward but I couldn't have it both ways. I had to give up one or the other.

I parked my truck behind his Volvo. As I cut the engine I noticed a movement in my peripheral vision and turned gasping as Alice opened the door and hugged me so tight that it was imposable to get free.

"I tried to hade my thoughts the best I could but I think he suspects that some thing is wrong." She whispered so softly I could just barely make out what she was saying. "I'm so sorry you have to do this." She said louder than before. "We don't hate you. Promise me we can still be friends. Promise me you'll still be friends with Edward." She begged in my ear. "I'll try" was all I could manage.

She released me and we turned to the house where I saw Edward standing in the doorway with a confused and pained expression.

How was it? Please review so I know if I should continue. Do you like it? Do you hate it? Constructive criticism welcome. I you have any ideas or possible answers to the questions in the summary please let me know. Thanks for reading.


	2. a painful heartbreak but not goodbye

Disclaimer- I don't own anything Stephanie Meyer does

Disclaimer- I don't own anything Stephanie Meyer does

**This is my first story so please review. I posted the first chapter of this story a while ago but it got unpostedI'll try to update more often, but only if people review. **

Edward's pov

I watched from the doorway as Alice hugged Bella, I heard the words they exchanged and it was then that I knew something was vitally wrong.

Then realization hit me

She chose Jacob

In so many ways I knew Jacob was better for her and a small part of me hopped that she would choose him. But that didn't spare me the heartache.

As she approached I fought the pain that I knew she would detect in my eyes. My face clouded over with the blank mask that hid the emotions I didn't want Bella to see. But inside pain raged, ripping at my insides and almost pulling me to my knees.

She came closer and walked up the front steps slowly.

"Edward, I'm so sorry." Her voice cracked on the last word and I could tell she was fighting tears. "I just love him more." She turned her head toward the forest, not wanting to look at me.

Alice walked around us toward the door, and paused there to give both of us sympathetic looks, before heading up the stairs.

I didn't reply. I focused on not letting the pain escape. Finally I managed "this isn't goodbye is it? We can still be friends, right?"

After a moment she turned her head and I tried to absorb as much as I could. Her brown eyes, pail skin, her lips, and hair, remembering, as I looked at her the blush that looked so beautiful. I couldn't imagine not being able to see her again. I remembered when I had left and how hard that was.

"No, this isn't goodbye. We could try to be friends, or at least still be in contact. I don't want to hurt you or Jacob any more than I already have." I could see that it was a relief to her that I had asked that question. But their was another question raiging to be answered, was their a chance she would change her mind? I couldn't ask that. I couldn't cause her more pain.

"Don't worry about hurting me, whatever makes you happy I'm okay with." It was true. She could have whatever part of me she wanted; she couldn't hurt me more than leaving me. "You can always change your mind, it's never too late." I didn't want to make her question her decision but I had to let her know that it was never too late for her to pick me. Part of me was with her for picking Jacob, he could give her so much more and he didn't have to worry about crushing her and wouldn't have to turn her into a vampire so that she would be protected from me. That still didn't stop the pain that coursed through me.

"I know, if it's okay with Jacob I won't leave you for good, I just don't want to hurt him any more, I don't want to hurt ether of you any more." She was struggling with tears and I couldn't stop myself from reaching forward and hugging her, tucking her head under my chin and kissing her hair.

I don't know how long we stood there like that, maybe a minute or two, but finally she pushed away and as she walked down the steps she took my heart with her. I followed her to her truck and opened the driver's side door for her and before I closed it I said "you will always have my heart and my love, you know where to find me."

I closed the door softly and walked at a human pace to the front porch and turned to take one last glimpse of her as she slowly backed down the driveway.

Should I really just let her go or should I keep fighting? I asked myself as I sped to my room and let the pain escape.


End file.
